Crazy Kinky Dirty Clowns

— It’s clowns. It’s a gangbang. It’s helium balloons. —

Some nights just don’t go as planned. It’s Halloween and Kyle’s rushing home to see his boyfriend after a late evening shift at work. As usual, he takes a shortcut through the local park, but a poster informing about a killer clown in the area makes him apprehensive about being alone in the dark. It’s only when he discovers there is a man in a clown costume following him that he panics. Soon, it turns out his cackling shadow isn’t the only circus freak hiding in the dark, but what does a bunch of crazy clowns do when they catch you?

Crazy Kinky Dirty Love # 4

[Previously published as Clown’d]

Themes: clowns, kidnapping, Halloween

Genre: erotica, contemporary

Erotic content: sizzling hot graphic language, gangbang, humiliation, role play, bondage, toys

Length: ~10,000 words

Kyle smiled at his phone and adjusted the messenger bag on his arm. He liked how protective Dan was of him.

He turned into an alleyway that led to the park he always took a shortcut through. After a long day at his soul-sucking job at Donna’s Donuts, it was always a relief to finish a shift and remove himself from that sugary hell. The worst thing was that Donna allowed the staff to snack on one doughnut per day and they had a discount. It was such a pain to work it off at the gym. Dan certainly wouldn’t love it if Kyle got some love handles on him. Tonight being Halloween, at least he could count on returning to a sugar-free home. Dan made it tradition to annually clear out their secret sweet stashes to the delight of the neighborhood kids. All he wanted was to be back with his boyfriend as soon as possible. Especially on a disgusting, soggy night like this. On the upside, at least it wasn’t raining.

The park wasn’t cleaned very often, so the old, wet leaves were a threat to the life of anyone not careful enough. Kyle liked a bit of thrill in his life though, so he ran down the hill with a gleeful yell. “Freeee!”

Kyle rarely saw anyone in the park so late, but just in case, he always switched off his MP3 player and walked extra fast. The thick fog dispersed the sparse glow of the old fashioned street lights. He found it hard to avoid walking into water puddles, and by the time he reached a small fountain in the middle of the park, his sneakers were already soaking wet. Oh well. At least he’d have an excuse for Dan to give him a hot bath. Not that they needed an excuse.

A large drop of water fell on Kyle’s head from the tree above him, but what stopped him was a large piece of paper on one of the lamp posts. Written in bold letters it stated:

“Be especially vigilant on Halloween and do not underestimate people in costume.

Up till now, the killer has worn a clown mask. See photo below.


Kyle looked down with furrowed eyebrows. “That’s sure one fugly clown,” he muttered, looking at the picture of a masked man with a big red nose and three patches of fuzzy hair in the same color, scattered over his otherwise bald head. His eyebrows were a painted-on frown, contrasting with a smiley mouth. “Seriously…” Kyle shook his head and quickly made his way forward, but couldn’t suppress the urge to look over his shoulder. Just in case. No one wanted a fucked up clown to jump them in the middle of the night. His stomach tightened when he spotted a chubby silhouette approaching from amongst the shadow of trees. Through the milky veil of fog, the figure gave the impression of something out of this world.

Deciding to suppress his anxiety, he walked a bit faster. He shouldn’t have read that poster. Now he’d be freaking out all the way home, because of something that was an obvious Halloween spoof.

Kyle managed to calm down, but as soon as he did, a loud sound turned his body into goosebumpy jello. It was a chuckle, and he had to force himself to keep looking forward instead of peeking over his shoulder like a neurotic teenager because of some guy who was probably just talking on a phone. That was what he tried to tell himself as he made the usual turn around a thick, hedged bush, but then, his heart came to a halt. He saw a man sitting on a bench right by a tall street lantern. With a red mohawk on his head, dressed in a pair of polka dot patterned breeches and mismatched striped stockings. It was a fucking clown!

Kyle’s eyes went wide and he made a quick turn in the opposite direction, to circle the guy. So not funny. He couldn’t help but look back at the clown, with his heartbeat rising. Only then, he saw that the chubby man he’d noticed earlier coming down the path was a clown as well, and Kyle’s stomach clenched tightly. This one hurried forward through the foggy park, dressed in a pair of overly wide pants held up by suspenders. He waved at Kyle, walking straight towards him.

“The fuck, man?” Kyle yelled back at him, not stopping for a second. The clown on the bench cackled. He freaking cackled! Kyle could already feel the chilling sweat beading under his puffy winter jacket. With a firm decision to take the next turn and flee the creepy pranksters, he picked up his pace to a point where he was almost trotting. His breath hitched when he heard two loud discordant laughs behind his back.

“No.” He didn’t want to actually say that out loud, but he did. Kyle was petrified to look back, but he couldn’t help himself. He would rather know how far ahead he was. This had to be a stupid prank!

Hanging onto that assumption, he ran into an old, graveled playground. Ran? When did he even start running? He toyed with the idea of calling the cops, but that would only take his focus off running, which had the highest priority. The playground seemed bigger than usual, but then he’d never tried to get through it so fast. The sight of the park gate brought a smile to Kyle’s lips. Just another turn along the fence and he’d be safe.

A creak came from the shadowed swing a few yards from the exit. It got his blood to freeze and then boil again when he realized someone was sitting on it. An adult. A third fucking clown.

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“HOLY HOTNESS!! This is a fun, short smut fix for all m/m lovers!”


.Monique (Sinfully Sexy Book Reviews)


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